2015
An Archive of @matt604's Twitter.
Pfffft. Lady, there's no WAY a banana could fit in this pocket. Ya, dummy.
This isn't the way I thought tonight's @VanCanucks / @LAKings game would shape up.
No THIS is how I expected the @VanCanucks / @LAKings game to go.
When I get my electric asshole, I hope I teach it how to whistle.
If I'm found dead, have the cops check this delicious artichoke dip. The seal wasn't intact and I'm hungry.
A picture from my bike ride on the seawall. http://t.co/8pS4eGaY4m
Talk about disappointing. When my alarm went off, I was dreaming I was on the way to the airport to catch a flight to Hawaii.
The Hobbit: How the 'clomping foot of nerdism' destroyed Tolkien's dream - and the fantasy genre | via @Telegraph http://t.co/SsNvxOF7oh
Fuck. Me. The Python/USB<->serial bug I've been fighting was really a kernel bug. I had a new kernel staged. Just a reboot. <facepalm>
Man...Two days after finishing 'The Shield' and I'm still digesting the series finale. Great television. Thanks, @ShawnRyanTV
Holy shit, I'm tired. Reprogramming one's sleep schedule is balls. I feel like all I've done the last few days is fight to stay awake.
RT @pmarmalade: I wonder how many calories bitches burn by jumping to conclusions
'Twas brilling and the slithy troves did gyre and gimble in the wabe: All mimsy were the borogroves and the mom's wrath outgrabe.
@fwdfwdplsread @ultrahax @ook @LeeCash "I haven't pooped yet" is a contender for my favourite.
Yesterday I realized I unconsciously move away from children about to learn a 'life lesson'. I think it's to get a better view.
Sweet! My @readingrainbow coffee mug arrived! http://t.co/n37WlSixAm
RT @partying101: Pre squash nachos were such a bad idea
Map: Restaurant health code violations in Metro Vancouver in 2014 http://t.co/W3o1OBCqZr
Interesting! The Good Country Index's top rated country? Ireland. http://t.co/DZJTziK4uA
Je suis une chèvre, ainsi j'ai faim. My French studies are progressing.
Whoops! I thought a handicap man moved in with the woman across the hall. I just found what I heard was her dog-walker greeting her dog.
@frlinux Soundgarden for Rocksmith? I am really curious how this will work with Kim's tunings. If my 90s guitar mag memory serves...
Yah! After taking my hangover on a nice long bike ride and then for pho, I feel majestic! And ready for a nap. Mostly ready for a nap.
@partying101 Awww. I've likely had more pho in the last two months than I did in the previous 10 years.
Taking the @TransLink 99 fart tube in the rain is a misery but still better than the trains we don't have.
Its so nice outside. It feels more like a Spring #Vancouver day than Winter.
Random high-five while I was riding my bike. #RichmondBC
Ate a big lunch. Thought a little too hard on taking the bus home...4 blocks.
Hah...Chrome wants to correct "mentoring" to "tormenting". Seems appropriate.
RT @AstroSamantha: Good night from #space! Buona notte dallo spazio! http://t.co/G4pEoh9omu
I feel a touch bad for websites as I'm actively pulling my data out and notice their little 'upgrade'/'donate' button. Okay. It's passed.
It is time for my decennial music collection clean up! Yay! Can you feel the excitement?!
I'd like to punch the engineer that thought grippy headphone plastic was better than smooth.
With more than 10,000 points, I’m now a @Todoist Karma Master! #ProductivityMaster https://t.co/L3aAdu3icI
Supreme Court of Canada strikes down ban on doctor-assisted suicide http://t.co/PUuDD9Y0Oj via @nationalpost
RT @johnbowman: Kids today ruining the English language. @jasonkapalka: Some 1880s slang that is due for a big comeback. http://t.co/da6Z8…
RT @SanJoseSharks: "The circle is coming to an end and I'm happy to retire as a Shark." -Evgeni Nabokov. #SJSharks #ThanksNabby http://t.co…
@partying101 Bah! All my blue-rinse homies are about the Elementary! Pfft... Mentalist.
Ahh..Drinking my morning coffee and watching #HockeyDayInCanada on OTA @CBC. Pretty sweet!
I found a Portland TriMet transit ticket in my messenger bag. I was last in Portland a year ago.
I just (somehow) typed 'rm -fr' instead of 'rm -rf'. It was a tiny bit thrilling! I may be overtired. I should nap.
Tonight I hope I fall asleep before the Lizard People take me. It's super awkward trying to pretend I'm asleep while they examine me.
What? @LAkings and @SanJoseSharks are playing OUTSIDE?!? In California?!?!? How cool is that? Get it? "How cool?" #dadjokes
I love the smell of a sweating mirepoix.
RT @nixcraft: I hate it when someone install a new kernel but forget to reboot the box. I don't like the surprises 😡 Be a man reboot the bo…
Flour, water, yeast and salt. http://t.co/YbaCuCRdMM
The goatse.cx page is now an advert for sub-domains? The video says "You can host anything [...] like your resume." o_O
It won't happen....but I am hopeful! http://t.co/KYnxBP5eha
Whoh! I just heard an explosion outside at the same time my lights flickered...? WTF just happened? #Vancouver
That feeling when you reboot and don't trust the disks in the RAID array.
RT @ultrahax: Obligatory DST-is-bullshit tweet.
@partying101 your past tense saddens me.
@partying101 I dunno. It'd be fun to play before I'm 50...
I just remembered the expression 'bloody blue blazes'. I need to use it more. Why in the bloody blue blazes did I forget this?
@LeeCash Oh nice. I'll add that to the list.
Umbrella? Check. Sunglasses? Check. Ah, #Vancouver Spring.
I have to pause The Slammin' Salmon. I was laughing WAY too hard. Michael Clarke Duncan was *hilarious* in this. Okay...Unpause.
RT @ConnorMayer: Isn't it spooky how animals always seem to know when you haven't written unit tests? http://t.co/27kDB1NUMi
@liamm @partying101 @kalemeow http://t.co/vjd3Ngp81H
I love metathinking! Think about that, then you are thinking about thinking about thinking.
Ow...Yeah...I just rubbed salt in my eye exactly like the pros do.
RT @pmarmalade: Walked into this elevator and saw a table and chair and a lady on her laptop 😅 http://t.co/GUPrPmpp1w
I am so loving @brokenlizard's #Supertroppers2 daily Farva videos. It's truly something I look forward to.
When I stepped outside, 4 birds of prey where circling overhead. Maybe I should shower.
@partying101 Saw toilet update. Saw one favorite. Didn't need to check to know it was @fwdfwdplsread.
Last night's sunset from West Vancouver http://t.co/pHrisqHrX6
RT @johnny_allen: Those poor cows. #OpenStackLive http://t.co/iJxpEM4G6R
A very beardy cabbie complimented me on my beard and expressed a little beard envy. This feels like an achievement.
@neilpwalsh hah. That picture is current circa 2010.
@ConnorMayer @neilpwalsh Wha..It's on Linkedin! Hey...Wait a minute. When did you start speaking for the Twitters?
Idea! The next time I feel the 'trouble bubbles', I'm going to say "OK Google" as I'm sitting down. What will Google search for?!?
I could have sworn I heard snoring. I turned my head and saw this #hootdog. http://t.co/j7IMvoWhVB
What is the normal amount of times, in a year, to ask yourself when your last tetanus shot was?
@fwdfwdplsread Hah! I didn't have time to get jabs b/c buildout trip. I DID a few months later when I got my hand sewn up.
@ook yep! Well I was in the operating room tbh
@ook oh wait. You mean this time? No, I just jabbed my self with sharp metal. No stitches.
@ook oh, yeah, thanks! I just put some alcohol on it. ;)
Got on the elevator, yesterday, to a neighbour holding car headlights she had just replaced. Of course, I told he she had nice headlights.
RT @ConnorMayer: Neat! http://t.co/Z93DO7skbC
Maybe one day I will remember that I really like fried plantains.
Happy #towelday!
Saw a @vanfirerescue pumper truck clip a car at Quebec and Broadway. Lemme know if you need a witness.
Reading my Apache logs, the sysadmin in me wants to fix these very very broken botnet scans.
This season is great for growing. I'm having to pare back my herbs. I have too much thyme on my hands. http://t.co/XFEXq93jrZ
@frlinux see Mastodon was in GoT?
Finished the Bard's Tale IV's first Q&A video with @BrianFargo http://t.co/6aZypI2WBp and I am MORE excited than when I backed it.
Went for a twilight stroll. Literally stopped to smell some roses. Also, pet a cat. Nice fucking walk.
I bought a daypack many years ago backpacking. I brought it in to show a coworker. We realized the bag is older than our co-op student. #old
Yesterday's dinner at my parents was terrible. Their backyard is infested with hummingbirds. (Okay, it was awesome)
TIL Bicycle Soccer is a thing. http://t.co/0MMueAiwHH
@Descendersound Dope mix on Data Transmissions! I've probably listened to it three times now.
A drop of Canadiana I've heard/watched more than thrice. The Loge Drivers Waltz: https://t.co/E7KEJ73kmb
It just dawned on me that "shepherd" is from "sheep herd". Wow. That took too long. #TIL
I'm going to ask my doc for a opthalmologist referral. When asked I'm going to say my dad had a stigmata..
@LeeCash @ConnorMayer @ook Tickets are $20. You gonna go Mike?
@ook @LeeCash @ConnorMayer lemme know if ur swayed. I'll snag one if you go
RT @ScanBC: #Victoria police is responding to Centennial Square after someone strung a hammock up between two trees and is refusing to take…
Just spent, like, twenty minutes watching the Canadian Forces #Snowbirds videos. Worth it.
I would like to see an addendum to the @CopsTV drinking game, where one takes a drink every time a police officer says "quick".
Switching on @evernote's beta, the layout is less broken, but now I can't select notebooks with #vimiium. /betaoff #KeyboardPlease
@yvrshoots Any idea what's shooting at 11th and Quebec? They've been set up for a couple days shooting in an apartment there.
@pursuit23 Oh, too cool. Thanks Ken!
I really enjoy the idea of ESL students thinking "running errands" is actually "running Aarons".
RT @ultrahax: Today's T-shirt is upsetting people at work. http://t.co/aRWcceh680
Did you know there is a handle bar moustache AND moustache handlebars? Which came first?
@kalemeow hahaha yeah. Defo first.
@rsmacapinlac I like the visual of a chicken with a handlebar moustache.
RT @vicecanada: Sorry Vancouver, Toronto and Calgary, But 'Most Liveable City’ Doesn’t Mean Shit: http://t.co/fA6GFCebm1
It is said you should do one thing a day that scares you. Yesterday I left my cell phone at home.
RT @rabihalameddine: waves http://t.co/rCC22eUero
@neilpwalsh I only went around the block. It was too much.
Check that you are registered to vote in the upcoming election! http://t.co/BR3KKL0Pdq
RT @joeyellis: ENTER PASSWORD.
WRONG.
WRONG.
WRONG.
WRONG.
WRONG.
WRONG.
RESET PASSWORD.
NEW PASSWORD CAN'T BE OLD PASSWORD.
sets …
RT @ScanBC: #Richmond #RCMP are responding to Iona Beach for a road rage incident. Reports an angry driver got out and body checked another…
RT @CSMPasscode: "Hackers" at 20: How a mostly inaccurate flop won over the real hacker community. http://t.co/j6jZTrnqyW http://t.co/sw7m0…
Fascinating. Mount McKinley was renamed to Denali last month.
RT @chriscoyier: you know who preferred the previous version? people that preferred the previous version last time
"It's like going up a dry hill backwards on cross country skis." Oh, I'm stealing that expression.
@partying101 Yeah. Das fair. I m going Dingus Anonimus. Do steps. no be dingus.
RT @honest_update: We replaced our monolith with micro services so that every outage could be more like a murder mystery.
Wow! Advanced polling in my district is an hour wait to vote. In Toronto some are 3 hrs!
So close! I can smell the gymnasium air!
@neilpwalsh I can safely say bad for me! :)
Finally! Civic duty completed.
@partying101 Bang Bang related?
Well, now...That was unexpected. #ElectionCanada
My brother txt me and said we were on the news. Us 30 years ago. Old expo footage. Weird!
https://t.co/vt9IBJoGLd I am in the blue cap and soccer jacket.
@rsmacapinlac yeah buddy. That was me 30 years ago!
@rsmacapinlac my bro in the camo hat.
@rsmacapinlac Wait. I thought you flew First class? #FeelsRacist
@rsmacapinlac ain't gonna lie #IAmAnEgg
@rsmacapinlac also. BORN in Richmond. ;)
@fwdfwdplsread took me a sec but...shit son.
Our team's co-op student just said "I'm going to Youtube how to use a Fax machine."
RT @honest_update: Let me tell you about time zones and why an hour of your data is missing…
"Squeaky little greasy one that almost went in." Hockey announcers. #Canucks
RT @textfiles: RIP Chuck Forsberg, creator of ZMODEM. 1944-2015. https://t.co/DGteTYNkr2 https://t.co/wUVnkKHYpx
I am smelling salami. Like, nice garlicky salami. I don't know where it is coming from. I am afraid to look under my couch. #realtalk
I just learnt _garlicky_ is a real actual word. #TheMoreYouKnow #PSA
@todoist how can I export my data without paying for a premium account?
Just saw a girl get hit by a car. She walked away tho. Wear bright clothes and cross at crosswalks! Be careful out there!
RT @Canada: #DYK a small patch of Mars is named after Winnipeg?Makes sense:it claims to be (sometimes) as cold as the Red Planet https://t.…
Co-worker: It'd be fine. Bullets don't bounce. Me: WHAT THE FUCK! YES THEY DO! There's even a term for it: ricochet!
@yvrshoots know what's filming at 11 and Quebec? Fake emergency vehicles. https://t.co/h3QVORUWrA
@motorcoach21 @yvrshoots it was a police car and ambulance. Didn't see which city.
@callisterbeer Do you folks still have the hazelnut beer? If so, do you do growlers?
@callisterbeer Aw shucks. That was very tasty. Thanks, I'll pop by to try this one!
Listening to @radiohead 's The Bends for the first time in a loooooong time. So many 90s memories.
@redicaps make sure your "instance type" supports ebs backed volumes! :)
I'm not one for feels. But, every few years I watch #BandofBrothers and so many feels.
RT @ScanBC: #Mission Fire on scene at Mission Leisure Center for sprinkler head hit by a puck. Need Ambulance for player hit in face with s…
It's so nice having all these Micro/Pico-breweries in East Van! If I go to a different one each time, they aren't hip to my alcoholism.
https://t.co/qOR4N1y1kk #santatracker I wish I had this as a kid!
I know I am drunk when my brother and I start playing head butt games.
Another day of fighting in my #Vancouver neighbourhood's brutal turf war. https://t.co/dQs4c2Nqkq
RT @StephenAtHome: Once everyone finds out they're delicious, the Ewoks are hunted to extinction. #spoilerspoilers
My parents think the cat has dementia, as he started howling in the middle of the night. I think he is just a furry little asshole.
RT @nixcraft: LOL. I do not want to be disturbed when I'm with my mum & dad. Okay? #sysadmin #humour #IT #life #Christmas #unix https://t.c…
Motörhead's Lemmy Dead at Age 70 https://t.co/JBLfXQOXBD
Sweet earthquake in East #Vancouver! That was more violent than when the truck hit the building!